My friend Cath and I have had a tradition of calling each other and saying "Hello, Happy Halloween - Boo!" It started in 1993 and we've only missed a couple years here and there. I need to call her and say it here in a bit before we get too busy with our preparations for tonight's Fall Festival at our church.

Here is a pic of D this morning before school in her way too cute Halloween Dress. It is a Michael Simon Jack-o-lantern dress that I got for her when she was 3 on sale at Dillards. It is a size 6 so I always envisioned her wearing it to Kindergarten on Halloween. Can you believe I remembered all these years :o) It was such a deal - a $50 dress on clearance for $3.45!! She wore it with her oh so stylish black leggings and orange ruffle socks. Please excuse the utility room backdrop - we were almost out the door before I remembered to take a photo!

I've also added a photo of her hairdo that I tried to be so creative with. I tried to innertwine an orange ribbon within her braid, but it didn't work so well :o(. Any hints?


Stay tuned - I'll add more Halloween photos later of the Bunny who will be attending the Fall Festival tonight. I'm off to the friendly neighborhood Wally-World to get her a short sleeved white shirt because I'm afraid she'll burn up in the white sweatshirt we had planned on - it's currently 82*!! I was sooo hoping for a non-sweaty Halloween this year - oh well.

This is a neat "movement" started by a lady who has struggled with Infertility for years but is finally, blessedly, currently pregnant!!

For anyone who has ever had a miscarriage, struggled with pregnancy, and all things infertile...there is a movement upon us that you might want to join. It's rather simple actually: a discreet ribbon on your right wrist to signal to others that they are not alone in their struggles.As someone who has had 5 m/c but am currently 5 months pregnant (YEAH), I wonder who looks at my big belly with sadness because they are in the month-to-month struggle. I mentioned to a friend that I wished there was some secret nod or international sign as if to say, this belly was hardwon. Well, she posted this quandary on her blog and the response has been quite overwhelming...and a movement has been born!

The pomegranate-colored thread holds a two-fold purpose: to identify and create community between those experiencing infertility as well as create a starting point for a conversation. Women pregnant through any means, natural or A.R.T., families created through adoption or surrogacy, or couples trying to conceive during infertility or secondary infertility can wear the thread, identifying themselves to others in this silent community. At the same time, the string serves as a gateway to conversations about infertility when people inquire about its purpose. These conversations are imperative if we are ever to remove the social stigma attached to infertility.Tie on the thread because you’re not alone. Wear to make aware. Join us in starting this conversation about infertility by purchasing this pomegranate-coloured thread (#814 by DMC) at any craft, knitting, or variety store such as Walmart or Target. Tie it on your right wrist. Notice it on others.

Just thought I would pass the word along!

I am trying so hard not to get my hopes up about the "rumors" on FRUA about Government Decision #268 being signed and just needing to be sealed and delivered!

That "rumor" was posted Wednesday the 25th, so maybe we'll hear something SOON!

Our coordinator in Russia, when we were there two weeks ago, said there were rumors but nothing substantiated that it will come soon. Along with some other movement that we're seeing here or there it is HARD not to get our hopes up!!

I am so ready to bring my little girl home, I miss her so much. It was wonderful to see her and hold her and smell her little orphanage smelling head :o). But I want her home to hold her and put some good smelling Baby Magic lotion on her and hear her squealing as she plays with her big sister.

I must say, though, that it has been a bit easier since I've seen her and know how well she is doing. It is almost as though we had our first trip all over again, just without the stress and pressure of meeting the MOE and Orphanage Director and Doctor for the first time. It was almost like "going home." We felt very at ease this last time. I hope it is that laid back next time when we go for court!

I just wanted to clarify a bit about the trip we took two weeks ago. It was strictly our choice to go and see V. It was not a mandated trip at all. Our agency was very supportive of us and made all the arrangements through the Ministry of Education and the Orphanage Director who had to grant us permission to come. I don't know how unusual it is for them to allow PAPS to come for an extra trip, but then again, it's not usual for families to have to wait 8 months + for a court date either. I am just thankful that it was allowed.

It's going to be hard not to just sit at this computer all day looking for "trumors" to come through! But my kitchen is a mess and it beckons me to come.

Till later . . .

The author writes:

"As I was working on Adoption Parenting: Creating a Toolbox, Building Connections, a wonderful piece that gets to the perspective of the adopted child's experience came across my desk and became the cornerstone of the first chapter, Getting Started. The mom, Cynthia Hockman Chupp, who wrote the story down did so with the help of her son's attachment therapist, Dr. Kali Miller. When I read it for the first time, I cried. Then I handed it to my husband to read. He looked at me with tears in his eyes. "I had no idea. I wish I had understood more when she was handed to us." he said. Me too. So for all you who are new parents or soon to be parents, this is important reading. And for the rest of us, it is always good to remember another perspective . . .

A Different Perspective
Imagine for a moment . . .

You have met the person you've dreamed about all your life. He has every quality that you desire in a spouse. You plan for the wedding, enjoying every free moment with your fiancee. you love his touch, his smell, the way he looks into your eyes. For the first time in your life, you understand what is meant by "soul mate, " for this person understands you in a way that no one else does. Your heart beats in rhythm with his. Your emotions are intimately tied to his every joy, his every sorrow.

The wedding comes. It is a happy celebration, but the best part is that you are finally the wife of this wonderful man. You fall asleep that night, exhausted from the day's events, but relaxed and joyful in the knowledge that you are next to the person who loves you more than anyone in the world . . . the person who will be with you for the rest of your life. The next morning you wake up, nestled in your partner's arms. You open your eyes and immediately look for his face. But it's not him! You are in the arms of another man. You recoil in horror. Who is this man?!

Where is your beloved?

Click here for the rest of the story http://www.emkpress.com/perspective.html

But no, V is not home yet. We just went to visit her because it has been so long since we've seen her. She is doing wonderfully and we were very happy with how things are with her. We were able to spend portions of 3 days with her and they were more "lenient" this time on our time with her. We were allowed to go into her Groupa and see where she lives her day to day life and her little bed where she sleeps in the room with 15 other babies.

She is still teeny-tiny, just 17 pounds 14 ounces and is now 28 inches tall. She's still in 9 months clothes, but can wear 12 months too. I took a pair of pajamas that I bought for D and V to match (there's a pic of D in her jammies that match V's), but I was afraid V would outgrow them before she came home, so I left them there. I got lots of pictures of her in them, though in case I can't find the exact pair. I took two pairs of shoes, size 4 and 3 and the 4's are still a little big, but the 3's too small so I left both those pairs since they were white and she won't be able to wear them after Easter (you know no white shoes before Easter :o)

She is doing great developmentally. About 3-4 months behind according to my What To Expect the Toddler Years book. She really surprised us! She's running all over the place and is very social. She is really affectionate, but she is indiscriminately affectionate, so we'll need to work on that when she gets home. She's just got a really great little personality. I saw not one bit of the rocking that we saw in March. That's not to say she doesn't do it to go to sleep, but at least she didn't feel overwhelmed and rock to soothe herself. She was way too busy for that!

We weren't able to do anything further toward getting a court date, there is nothing that can be done until our agency's accreditation is renewed. But we are so hoping that it comes soon and that we'll be able to be over there quickly once it comes through. A representative from the Ministry of Education was at the orphanage while we were visiting, she was observing another family who was about to go to court and she stopped in our little "closet room" to visit with us a minute. I think it can only help our case for them to see our commitment to V and that we are dedicated to bringing her into our family.

It was 100 times harder to leave her though than it was the first time. I had a mini-melt down. I was crying so hard, even our coordinator was crying. I don't remember crying that hard since I was a child. You know the kind where you're crying so hard you have hiccup breathing? My sister always thought I was acting when I did that, but it is real. Too real.

The time went by so quickly and we made such a fast trip that we were just wiped out. We flew from Dallas to Atlanta - 5 hour layover - Atlanta to Moscow. Then we had 5 hours to kill before we could go to the train, so we went to the Kremlin then ate lunch at the Starlite Diner then went to the Cathedral of Christ Our Saviour then to the train. On the train I had a bit of a breakdown from the shear exhaustion. We rode the 15 hours overnight to the region and when our coordinator picked us up she asked if we wanted to go to the apartment and rest and shower or go straight to the orphanage. When we asked her what hours we could visit V she told us only from 9:30 - 12 on Monday and it was alreay 9:15! Of course we then went straight to the orphanage!! We hadn't had a shower in nearly 3 days!

When they brought her in, I just grabbed her from the "nannie" and started bawling! I was hoping I didn't scare her! But she was fine. We both held her for a while and then it occurred to us that she could walk now so we put her down and witnessed her first steps in front of us. Then she was off and running! We only had about an hour and a half with her because they came to get her at 11:15! So much for the 12 -o-clock timeframe. We spoke with the orphanage director and he said we could meet with the doctor the next day at 3 p.m. so we came at 3 to see V and she was in there with us while we talked to the Doctor. I'm glad I had my questions ready. We were supposed to see her from 3-5 that day, but we ended up staying till 6:30. That is when we took her to her groupa and saw her bedroom and all the little toddlers sitting on their potties getting ready for bedtime. She had missed her supper, so she sat down at her little table to eat and she kept getting up and coming over and hugging our legs and then running back to her table. It was precious. The last day we spent from 3-5 with her and then it was over way too soon! The one "nannie" who just comes and whisks her away was the same one who came and got her that last time. I just watched them walk down the hall and V was smiling and waving at me as they rounded the corner. Then I lost it. The social worker was just hugging me and saying who knows what. I was a wreck. Then we were off to the train. I just cried the whole way. We took the train to Moscow Wednesday night and arrived Thursday morning. We spent the night at the Ukraina and then headed to the airport Friday morning. It was a fast trip and we're paying the price in jet-lag.

I am so glad we were able to see her, though. I would do it all again - but hopefully we'll be back for her soon. We are praying so hard that she'll be home by Christmas, but it'll take a miracle.

I wish so badly that I could post a picture for you all. She is such an angel.

I'm sorry I couldn't tell you all on the blog before we left, but we just wanted to be sooooo careful. I didn't intentionally wait tonight to finish the story, but I was babysitting for our friends. They adopted their daughter who was born on March 7, when we were in Russia on the first trip. So, I was very busy tonight with an almost 8 month old and trying to get D ready for bed. It's going to take some time for me to find a routine once V comes home! It's hard to juggle it all. I don't know how Kim does it with 6!!!

The stocking was bought in the gift shop at the Ukraina. We got D a red one and V a blue one. I think they were about $9 or $12 each. I didn't think that was too bad at all. We had seen them at the market last time and didn't buy them, and I have regretted it. So we went ahead and got them. We found the Cheburashka in our region for only $5! I'd looked all around Moscow last trip and couldn't find one. We also got the Russian Alphabet blocks at the Ukraina.

Ok, the beans are spilled. Please don't egg my house!

So, were any of you a little curious about where we went on our trip?

Were you wondering to yourselves, " why has Suz who usually tells everything and more than we really need to know never said said where they were heading on their trip?"

Well here are a few photo clues from the souvenirs we bought on the trip:

Wow, I've got a fun blog pal! A few minutes ago the postman banged on my door like the house was on fire or something, scared me silly! But he had a package and he wanted me to have it right then and there :o)

Here is what my package held - a sweet gift from my blog pal!

Thank you so much, I'm going to print out picture for it (I know just the one) and will put it in V's room!

I'll post more about it later. I just wanted to get on here and say hello and let you all know we're back. I know you've just been on pins and needles wondering when we'd return, right?

THANK YOU to my blog pal. I had a surprise in the mail when we got home. A Starbucks gift card :o) we just stopped at Starbucks on the way in from the airport this morning too, we could have used it!

Till later ...... zzzzzzzz

Five years ago today we went to court and the judge said "DA!" That is the day D became our forever daughter, October 12, 2001. In some ways it seems eons ago and like we have never been without D. But then again it seems like only yesterday. It is so amazing how quickly time really does pass.

Our judge was terrific. He was pretty much all business during the proceedings, but did make a joke or two here and there. Especially when he asked hubby our Wedding anniversary and hubby answered two days off!! Of course, I couldn't say anything! When the judge is talking to one or the other of you, the one NOT being spoken too has to zip their lips. So my eyes just got big and I looked at the judge and smiled. He laughed and asked hubby, "are you sure?" Afterward he took pictures with us. He was great. It made my first time in a court room a little more tolerable.

October 12 is also Grandma's birthday, so in 2001 she received the best birthday present ever! Her first grandchild. Happy birthday Grandma!

Now my baby girl is nearly 6 years old! It is so hard to believe.

Her Russian passport is about to expire and we need to renew it. I've got to take her to have her passport picture made so we can get that done. I inquired of the Russian Consulate to make sure we would receive her old one back because that baby picture in the passport is too precious! They assured me we would get it back. Just in case we have court for V over Christmas time, we'll take D with us, so she needs a valid passport.

Happy family day D! I love you so . . .

I'm still coughing up a lung, so I've got a 2 p.m. appointment to see the doctor. I hope he'll give me a shot and I'll get better quick!

I'm still trying to get my messy house under control. It seems like it's two steps forward and three steps back. My in-laws are coming to stay with D while Hubby and I go on our trip and I want it clean for them when they come.

I've got a hair appointment on Wednesday to get my hair colored and cut, it's out of control. I know you're not supposed to do that right before something big, so I hope I don't look like a goof for our trip!

I'm looking forward to spending some one on one time with hubby on our little trip but you know what else I'm so excited about? We got a good deal on staying at the Hyatt Regency at the DFW airport the night before we fly out on Saturday. It's called Sleep-Park-Fly and we can store our car in their garage and take the shuttle to the terminal Saturday morning. Our flight leaves at 8:00 so we'll have to be checking in by 6 a.m. so I'm just looking forward to that little luxury.

Ok, back to laundry and trying to get my house in shape. I'll let you know what the doctor says, hopefully I don't have rockin' pneumonia too!

till later . . .

edited/updated after doctor's appointment: I don't have rockin' pneumonia, it's just a case of bronchitis. I got two prescriptions for some mega horse pill antibiotics and some heavy duty cough/congestion medicine. One of them is making me nauseas but I'll put up with it if it'll kick this thing in the hiney-bo!

When was I ever going to post anything new?!?

Boy, it's been chaotic around here. First off D had the Rockin' Pneumonia. Then all the updating of the paperwork began. I think I'm finished with this round, unless they come up with something else! When I read Dawn's post about having her paperwork complete, I figured that must be a huge difference between Kaz adoption and Russia. I don't know if I'll ever be complete with paperwork on this adoption! It took me nearly all of the past two weeks to get it all done, and I think I'm finally finished. I had to fax the copies of the docs (not the apostilles) to our agency and I think it's the longest fax I've ever sent! 22 pages!

We're getting ready to go on a trip next week and I've been trying to get everything together for that. I think I've contracted D's Rockin' pneumonia, but I haven't had a chance to get to the doctor! I'm going to have to go on Monday if I'm still coughing like this by then. I can't imagine flying next to ME with the sounds of my coughing up a lung every few minutes.

I had to take my van in this morning to the dealership to have it fixed. Yes, I joined the ranks of mini-van moms. I love my van, but it's making this dribbly sound on the front tire and I've been afraid my tire was just going to dribble off and go rolling down the road without me. Of course after I waited for two hours in the waiting room they come back to tell me that it's my strut and they don't have that particular model in stock and will need to order it. Can I come back next week? No, I'm going on a trip next week. Will my tire dribble off and leave me? Am I safe to drive with a stunted strut? Yes, I'm safe - but how far am I going to drive? To Dallas?! Ok, I'm good.

But what happened in the waiting room while I waited is what has me a little worked up. An older man, probably in his 70's was sitting next to me while we waited. We had chatted a bit earlier and he seemed like a nice friendly, grandfatherly sort. I was working on my new book (which I highly recommend) Teach Yourself Beginner's Russian. Well, I was working for a good bit and was pretty proud of myself because the first few chapters I was just whizzing through. It's kind of a workbook where you decipher the word in Russian and fill in the English equivalent. So, the older man asks me, "what are you working on, a word scramble?" " No," I reply, " I'm learning Russian." He physically leaps up, bounds to the other side of the tiny room and looks at me like I just said, "No, I have leprosy!" To which I look at him as if he has three heads! He said, "why are you learning Russian!" Although I wanted to say, "WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM!" I calmly told him that my husband and I are in the process of adopting a baby girl from Russia. He answers, "well, you'll just need to teach her English!" "Of course we will, but I'll need to be able to communicate with her a bit before she learns English. I need to be able to tell her things like "it's ok", "are you hungry?", "Mama loves you." He nodded and walked outside. I think he was a little ashamed of himself. He should have been. Of course I can understand that someone of his generation might have lingering thoughts of the cold war era. But that was then and this is now. I tell you, I was hurt. This is the first negative reaction I've had during this adoption. The general reaction is that of excitement for us and for V. So, this kind of threw me for a loop. Well, a while later he came back in and started asking me some questions about Russian adoption, why did we choose Russia, etc. I am proud of myself for staying calm, and for even not crying because I've just been in that kind of place lately. But I calmly explained a-lot to him and showed him pictures of D and V. Then he told me about being in Germany when the Berlin wall was put up and how he patroled the borders. I'll give it to him, he came a long way in that 45 minutes from acting like I had leprosy to genuinely wishing me luck when I left to get into my van with the dribbly tire. We're advocating for our kids, even before they come home. Come home V - please come home!

I just wanted to share how much I love tracking my Fed-Ex packages! It is so satisfying to see those packages making their way across the state and back to me. Yay! Woo Hoo! I've got one that should be knocking on my door within the next 41 minutes! Another will be arriving in Houston within that same 41 minutes (must be delivered before 10 a.m.!) The other still shows up as "not found" (that's the prepaid return mailer in the one going to Houston). Then there's the one that says "Delivered" and even shows proof of it by showing me the signature of that person who signed for it. Man, I love technology!

Debbie and I assigned the blog pals yesterday. She took half and I took half. We have 24 participants. If you sent in a questionnaire, but have not received your blog pal assignment, please let us know!