Thanks for all the responses
Thursday, September 13, 2007
I have been leaning toward going ahead with the new blog and now I really feel like I should. Knowing the right time to switch over is the hard part.

In the middle of the big heart pain, right after we found out about losing Vika, I set up a new blog. It seemed the right thing right then. But then as the time passed and the hurt has softened, I've been rethinking it. But I think the time is almost here when I'll switch over to the new blog.

In answer to those who asked in the post below, yes I will definitely keep Russian Adoption Dva alive. I think it will be good for people to read. Of course when you read stories like ours, you think, "It could never happen to us." But it can. I hate that it does, but it does happen.

I think of Vika every day, but the pain is lessening now. I know it will get better as time passes and I know it is a huge blessing that all this house stuff happened when it did. No matter how extremely stressful it was, it was a blessing. I know that being out of the house that held her room for nearly 18 months is helpful in that healing. I really haven't missed the old house much. This move has really taught me that home is where my family is. Whether it's in an old mobile home with spiders and ants, or in a fancy new house. We drive by the old house everday when I pick D up from school and they've already changed it so much (for the worse I might add!) We say, "hey old homey." and drive on out to the country.

By the way, I checked the databank for the first time in a week or so and Vika has finally been removed. It was updated on September 6. I know it may sound weird, but I'm glad to see her off there. It means she really has been adopted and now we can only hope and pray that the family is good.

So, yes, I'll be moving again soon - blog address this time instead of home address. But it may take me a while to let go here. Bear with me, ok? Thanks so much for all the support I get from you other PAPs (pre-adoptive parents).

With tears in my eyes, I close. When will the tears stop? Maybe never.
9 Comments:
Blogger Chris Goeppner said...
Hey Suz,
Good decision. I look forward to reading your new blog as you move forward on your 3rd adoption.
Thank you so much for your encouraging words on my blog. I hope you are right!=)
Many Blessings,
Penny

Blogger Debbie said...
You sound so positive but I can tell your heart is still broken. I pray for you and Vika all the time. I'm glad that she was finally removed from the database, I'm sure it was hard to still see her smiling face there.

If you need any help with the new blog let me know. I'm not a pro but I'm here to help.

Blogger Michael and Carrie said...
I know you have had so much going on lately that you've been keeping your mind distracted, but I know you still think about Viktoria. I imagine she will always be in your thoughts. I'm praying for you as you start the process towards your little girl. I'll follow you wherever your blog takes you.

I hope you are getting settled into your new home.

Blogger Tricia said...
Sounds like things are getting back to "normal" emotionally but events like loosing Vika will be with you forever (sad, but true). At least that has been my experience (not adoption-related). I truly wish the best for you and your family as you start adoption #3. And along the way, whenever you want to talk about Vika, I'll be here to listen.

Blogger Esther said...
You'll always remember her, even though the pain lessens.

I feel there will always be a hole in my heart, where ZsaZsa is missing. Occasionally I cry out of the blue, when say, a memory floods my head.

In the middle of all our happiness currently with finding our two girls, I cried when I went to bed the other night. Because I feel ZsaZsa has been forgotten. Don't really know how to explain it. Maybe I'm emotional. It hits me here and there with no warning.

Blogger sandy said...
So much change has happened in the past month! I am so sad for your loss. But also encouraged to see that you are moving forward. We are still trying to figure out what to do... it's been so confusing I haven't even been able to bring myself to blog about it. Soon, I hope. Please make sure to let us know where the new blog is so we can keep up with you. Take care.

Blogger Adrienne and Jim said...
Of course we all will read your new blog! Just let us know how to get to it, and we'll be there :) I think it's sweet you want to devote this one to Vika.

Blogger Rachael said...
Are you going to direct us to the new site? My detective skills are no so good, but I'm anxiously awaiting the new chapter.

Blogger Tami said...
I'm glad you're finding the strength to start this new chapter. Please know that wherever you go, we will follow. ;)


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