I tried to do this yesterday, but it has been hard for me to let go.

I guess it's time to close the door on Russian Adoption Dva and move on down the road.

This has been my home in adoptionland for 17 months and leaving it is tough, but it's time.

So follow me around the next curve in the road to my new home and new beginnings at Long And Winding Road to Home.

Lights out, let's go . . .

I have been leaning toward going ahead with the new blog and now I really feel like I should. Knowing the right time to switch over is the hard part.

In the middle of the big heart pain, right after we found out about losing Vika, I set up a new blog. It seemed the right thing right then. But then as the time passed and the hurt has softened, I've been rethinking it. But I think the time is almost here when I'll switch over to the new blog.

In answer to those who asked in the post below, yes I will definitely keep Russian Adoption Dva alive. I think it will be good for people to read. Of course when you read stories like ours, you think, "It could never happen to us." But it can. I hate that it does, but it does happen.

I think of Vika every day, but the pain is lessening now. I know it will get better as time passes and I know it is a huge blessing that all this house stuff happened when it did. No matter how extremely stressful it was, it was a blessing. I know that being out of the house that held her room for nearly 18 months is helpful in that healing. I really haven't missed the old house much. This move has really taught me that home is where my family is. Whether it's in an old mobile home with spiders and ants, or in a fancy new house. We drive by the old house everday when I pick D up from school and they've already changed it so much (for the worse I might add!) We say, "hey old homey." and drive on out to the country.

By the way, I checked the databank for the first time in a week or so and Vika has finally been removed. It was updated on September 6. I know it may sound weird, but I'm glad to see her off there. It means she really has been adopted and now we can only hope and pray that the family is good.

So, yes, I'll be moving again soon - blog address this time instead of home address. But it may take me a while to let go here. Bear with me, ok? Thanks so much for all the support I get from you other PAPs (pre-adoptive parents).

With tears in my eyes, I close. When will the tears stop? Maybe never.

I have really been thinking things over lately trying to decide if I will continue blogging the next phase of our adoption here at Russian Adoption Dva (which means two in Russian). For one thing, this is no longer our second adoption. I think Viktoria deserves that title. In starting over, in my mind I consider this our third attempt. Because really, folks, we are starting over nearly from the beginning here! Did you see how far I fell on Debbie's list - it nearly makes me cry all over again :O(

So, let me know your thoughts. I know it's my ultimate decision - but do you think people will get "lost" trying to find me if I move??

I spoke on the phone yesterday with our casemanager and we're ready to start the new round of paperwork and updating the homestudy. So, I need to make a decision.

I love Gymobree clothes for D. They are having an online sale September 14-16 at http://www.gymboree.com/

They always have $5.95 shipping for the total order, since they're all so far away from me I completely save that in gas money. Here is the promotion code to save 30% on your total order at checkout! Promo Code : GYMFRIEND

Do you remember the show "Green Acres"? Well, that's my life now.

We have had so much adventure moving to the country from town.

We are completely in the double wide now. We're about 90% unpacked and pretty much settling into our life here.

As I've worked I keep returning to the part of the song where it says "you are my wife, goodbye city life." I am thankful, though, that we have a place to live and it's decent. It's not my first choice in life, but we'll be ever more thankful for our sparkling new house once it's built.

Our dog was "skunked" night before last! Saturday night was the first time hubby and I have ever seen a real, alive (not dead on the side of the road) skunk! It was out in the field and Sundae (our dog) was having lots of fun chasing it. It must have given a warning spray that night because Sundae shook her nose and huffed alot, but didn't stink. We got her to come in and she avoided being skunked on Saturday night, but on Sunday night Pepe Le'Peu got her bad! She had to sleep outside in her kennel. Then last night I gave her a bath in a solution of Hydrogen Peroxide/Baking Soda/Liquid dish soap. She still doesn't smell like a rose, but it's wayyy better.

I haven't been online hardly at all in the past 10 days or so. It has been such a huge job getting us moved and settled so quickly.

D started first grade last Monday right in the midst of all this chaos. She left for her first day of first grade from the Holiday Inn Express! I've got pictures to prove it, if I could find the chord to upload them, I would.

D is having a ball being a country girl, it's just that she is sooo sensitive to mosquitoes and ant bites that she looks terrible, she's just "eat up with them" as they say here in the boon-docks.

Well, our "month off" from adoption is over. We have decided we will continue on with Russian adoption and that Smolensk will be our region. We haven't yet begun the new round of paperwork, but we'll get to that soon. We will most likely raise our age parameters to 24 months or under and still request a girl.

We got our preliminary drawings from the architect and will have a meeting with the builder to get things moving. I hope that the work will begin in the next week or two on clearing the trees from the land and getting the dirt work started at least. It will be exciting to see the new house get started.

I'm going to go finish making some kitchen curtains. I've gotten the ones done for the back door (which is really the front door) and still need to get the ones finished on the window above the sink. When they parked this mobile home here, they parked the front facing the lake (which really looks more like a swamp to me) and so now you drive up and enter from the back so now it's the front. Did that make any sense??

Sorry I was gone so long. Life has been beyond crazy and now hopefully we'll get back to a bit more normalcy. It's almost like we're playing house. I stored so much stuff that we only have what we need to get by for 6-8 months (which is still A LOT of stuff!) And I'm not worrying about decorating to impress. It's easy to keep clean since we don't have as much stuff!

I'll try not to be so long in posting now.

Glad to be back!